Wednesday, February 07, 2007

song stuck in my head

On the bus on the way home from work, I realized I had a song running through my head. Then I realized the song was

First and second books of Nephi,
Jacob, Enos, Jarom, Omni,
Words of Mormon and Mosiah.
Singing this is so fun!

Alma, Helaman, third, fourth Nephi,
Book of Mormon and Moroni.
We just sang our little song
About the Book of Mormon.

Where the hell did that come from? Just popped into my head, out of the blue. I used to pride myself on my scripture-chase knowledge of the Book of Mormon. I used to be able to say how many chapters are in each book, and tell the stories inside and out. Today, I had to go look up the order of the books. And that made me glad.

Actually, some primary songs were important to me in my childhood. I used to love "Love is Spoken Here."

I see my mother kneeling with my family each day.
I hear the words she whispers as we bow our heads to pray
Her plea to the Father quiets all my fears
And I am thankful love is spoken here.

Mine is a home where every hour
Is blessed by the strength of priesthood power
With father and mother leading the way
Teaching us how to trust and obey
And the words they teach are crystal clear
For love is spoken here.


I hated when they divided the verses between girls and boys, so the boys would sing the verse about the priesthood power. Girls homes were blessed by priesthood power too! I especially liked the first verse, because it reminded me of my family. We did pray as a family every day, and I have good memories from those times. I still like the message about love and family, but I could do without the Father and the priesthood thing.

Then there was A Child's Prayer. I never learned the song while I was in primary, but I learned it afterward from my younger brother and sisters.

Heavenly Father, are you really there?
And do you hear and answer every child's prayer?
Some say that heaven is far away,
But I feel it close around me as I pray.
Heavenly Father, I remember now
Something that Jesus told disciplines long ago:
Suffer the children to come to me,
Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee.

Pray, He is there. Speak, He is listening.
You are His child, His love now surrounds you.
He hears your prayer, He loves the children,
Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of Heaven.


I sang that song to myself whenever I wanted comfort, and it helped. The idea of God as a loving father-figure who knew and loved me personally was very comforting for me. Sometimes I miss that. Now, trying to conceive of God as Heavenly Father is weird and empty. In those moments when I try to think of believing in God, I never think of God as a Him, and not even as anthropomorphic.

These days, the only primary songs I sing--to my kids at bedtime--are Popcorn Popping (a celebration of nature) and Once There Was a Snowman.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Don't forget "When We're Helping We're Happy." It's a bit corny, but secular and good for indoctrinating kids.

Lemon Blossom said...

Wow, I bet that was a surprise!

I loved, loved, loved "Love is Spoken Here." And I would always quietly sing the verse with the boys because I wanted to sing that verse as well. And "The Spirit of God" would give me the chills.

I also used to love Hillary Weeks, especially "He Hears Me" and "Day of Gladness."

I used to find so much comfort in the hymns of the church, but now they just make me anxious. I am reminded of my transitional, confusing state which I am trying so hard to forget about right now.

Anonymous said...

I actually sang A child's prayer in sacrement meeting with my parents when I was a pre-teen.

I love popcorn popping - I think they discourage singing it now. Too secular.

Anonymous said...

Ahhh, Love is Spoken Here. I love how the music for verse about the mother is all flowery and sweet and the music for the father's verse gets all slow and authoritative.

Primary songs are really kind of creepy. I was at lunch with an exmo coworker once and for some reason Book of Mormon Stories came up, and we started singing and doing the hand motions. Our nevermo lunch mates were both horrified and amused beyond all belief. :)

Anonymous said...

I always sung the boys' parts quietly, too. =X I didn't like how the girls' verse in "Love is Spoken Here" assumed I had something to be afraid of, with the "quiets all my fears" line.

The millitant hymns were the only ones I really enjoyed - "The Spirit of God" was my favorite. I hated singing time in general though since my dad bellows the words out so that he's louder than everyone else. It shows how much more righteous he is, I suppose.

I can't stand having those songs stuck in my head now, though. Those little bits of indoctrination that are so hard to get away from.

Threads of the Divine said...

Hymns are hard to rid yourself of. "Do as I'm doing" is a good one. Maybe I should teach my kids that one.

from the ashes said...

ujlapana- Yes, there was a fair bit on indoctrinating in primary. (shudder)

lemony- Sorry to bring up bad memories!

aerin- That's too bad about Popcorn Popping. Toddlers love it, and how is celebrating nature too secular? They can think of God as that creator.

roly- Oh, Book of Mormon stories. We did that one a lot. How about the little "Indian feathers" symbol behind the head for the Lamanite part?

cw- I liked Spirit of God, too. When I was young, I only liked the fast (militant) hymns, too, but when I was older, they disturbed me and I refused to sing them.

Simeon- I forgot about Do as I'm Doing! I bet my kids would like that too.

Sister Mary Lisa said...

Ha ha ha on Simeon's "Do As I'm Doing..." Follow ME, kids, right outa the church!!!

I taught my kids that song to where we'd sing it in harmony, the two parts at the same time. We loved that song. I wonder what my non-mormon hubby felt as we sang it each night. God. I'm ashamed.

Re-write the words "Mine's NOT A HOOOME, where every hoooour, is blessed by the streeeength of priesthoooood power!"

from the ashes said...

Oh, yeah, Simeon--I didn't even get your joke! That's awesome.